Should you “be yourself” when you first start dating?

Yes and no.

In general, I think being yourself is the only way to act in any given situation ONLY after you have LEARNED what works and what doesn’t in terms of whatever situation it is that you are aiming to achieve success in.

In our case, it’s dating and women.

Often enough, “being yourself” when you first start to learn dating means you won’t get to the second or third date, you won’t have sex, you won’t be able to land a gf etc etc.

THAT’S FINE.

You should be okay with “failure”, which I put in quotes because I hate calling it that.

Think about it more as “experience points”, which, in my opinion, has extremely high value.

Without experience points, growth is impossible.

If you are at a stage where you are having constant trouble getting women our or anything else past that phase, don’t get down on yourself.

You literally should be happy. If you’re not, you’re letting your emotions dictate your disposition more than logic.

If you listen to logic, you’ll quickly realize that the steps you’re taking are leading you to the place you want to go – and that’s awesome.

The next step is becoming conscious about refining your skills through the process. Once you become conscious of your moves, your progress will accelerate.

Should you “be yourself” when you first start dating? Yes, then no, then yes, then no, then yes, then no, then yes, then no until you have CREATED a “self” that achieves success to a degree which you are satisfied with.

Then, yes forever*.

There are plenty of areas you should be looking forward to improving when it comes to attracting women. How to dress attractively, how to talk, act, kiss, touch attractively. How to lead and not chase.

How to structure your life such that you have a balanced set of priorities, each with equal value, including a relationship. Maybe pick one to work on each week, or month, and remind yourself that you’re on an adventure of self-mastery.

Enjoy the process of creating yourself.

*At this point, “yes forever” generally means that the “self” which you have created is one that is constantly learning and adapting in ways that are advantageous to all situations.